Do you ever have days where you think "omg if you weren't my kid I would think you are such a jerk and try to avoid speaking to you?"
Hopefully I'm not a complete bitchfacefromhell because that's how a child who shall remain nameless made me feel today. Kid doesn't get I'm on a heck of a a lot of steroids you push me I will either completely ignore you or blow up at you. I usually avoid shouting as much as I can but you can't be perfect all the time. It's days like this that can lead me into a downward spiral in my head, always leading to me blaming myself for why they have been the way they are. I'm probably not perfectly innocent but my negative thought spirals don't really get me anywhere so I'm venting in a post.
Parenting babies was so easy compared to parenting kids as they get older. For a start you know they will remember everything. I guess as a parent you never really know if you are doing it right until it's too late. So you just need to try your best.
With regards to updating on life as promised.. well
I've had my husbands 40th birthday, which I managed to plan and attend a party for. So that was quite a feat.
A small op on my eye to removed a growth. It was gross and my chest wasn't keen on a general anaesthetic but it behaved in overall. Then I made a 72 brownies and an entire wedding cake one eyed.
Made it to my brothers wedding (hence cake and brownie making) 3 days after the op. Got to look like a celeb wearing sunglasses all day. I did a reading too. I was exhausted and couldn't dance like I once would have. But I was there. And it was every bit as beautiful as I hoped.
I had an amazing appointment with the respiratory psychiatrist. I genuinely think I am a little bit in love with her (not like I love my husband or my children but she's pretty high up there). I filled with dread when I first learned I needed to see her as part of my overall care. But she's helped me in ways I didn't know I needed. Ladies a saint. If anyone is ever in a position where they need to see someone take it. It might not work for you. But open mindedness with these things can show you things you never considered.
I am so ridiculously excited I am going to moulin rouge at the secret cinema next Wednesday. I've had a few really bad days with my chest but I've spoken to them and managed to secure parking at the venue. I won't be able to dance (oh how I miss dancing) but I should be able to go. I went to the dirty dancing showing in July and it was fab, however I think the moulin rouge is more of an experience, we have to learn songs and everything.
My kids are in a show this weekend which also excites me. I love seeing them work hard and achieve things. (Don't get me wrong they aren't west end style but it's really amazing to watch them).
Callie :-)
Hopefully I'm not a complete bitchfacefromhell because that's how a child who shall remain nameless made me feel today. Kid doesn't get I'm on a heck of a a lot of steroids you push me I will either completely ignore you or blow up at you. I usually avoid shouting as much as I can but you can't be perfect all the time. It's days like this that can lead me into a downward spiral in my head, always leading to me blaming myself for why they have been the way they are. I'm probably not perfectly innocent but my negative thought spirals don't really get me anywhere so I'm venting in a post.
Parenting babies was so easy compared to parenting kids as they get older. For a start you know they will remember everything. I guess as a parent you never really know if you are doing it right until it's too late. So you just need to try your best.
With regards to updating on life as promised.. well
I've had my husbands 40th birthday, which I managed to plan and attend a party for. So that was quite a feat.
A small op on my eye to removed a growth. It was gross and my chest wasn't keen on a general anaesthetic but it behaved in overall. Then I made a 72 brownies and an entire wedding cake one eyed.
Made it to my brothers wedding (hence cake and brownie making) 3 days after the op. Got to look like a celeb wearing sunglasses all day. I did a reading too. I was exhausted and couldn't dance like I once would have. But I was there. And it was every bit as beautiful as I hoped.
I had an amazing appointment with the respiratory psychiatrist. I genuinely think I am a little bit in love with her (not like I love my husband or my children but she's pretty high up there). I filled with dread when I first learned I needed to see her as part of my overall care. But she's helped me in ways I didn't know I needed. Ladies a saint. If anyone is ever in a position where they need to see someone take it. It might not work for you. But open mindedness with these things can show you things you never considered.
I am so ridiculously excited I am going to moulin rouge at the secret cinema next Wednesday. I've had a few really bad days with my chest but I've spoken to them and managed to secure parking at the venue. I won't be able to dance (oh how I miss dancing) but I should be able to go. I went to the dirty dancing showing in July and it was fab, however I think the moulin rouge is more of an experience, we have to learn songs and everything.
My kids are in a show this weekend which also excites me. I love seeing them work hard and achieve things. (Don't get me wrong they aren't west end style but it's really amazing to watch them).
Callie :-)
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